I am a recovering sugar addict. As I work to overcome my own addiction, I've decided to blog about it and hopefully help others along the way.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Fervent Prayer to Overcome Addiction
This morning I read Elder Ballard's talk from the last October General Conference. What an incredible talk on overcoming addiction! I've been reading the talks in order, and this is the one I was on. I needed it! If you'd like to read the whole thing, click on the link below.
classic.lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-1298-34,00.html
Elder Ballard said that Satan uses addiction to steal away our God-given agency. Elder Ballard then defines addiction: "to surrender to something, thus relinquishing agency and becoming dependent on some life-destroying substance or behavior."
"Lucifer knows our 'hunger' or weaknesses, and tempts us with counterfeit lures which, if taken, can cause us to be yanked from the stream of life into his unmerciful influence."
There is hope.
"Fervent Prayer is key to gaining the spiritual strength to find peace and overcome an addictive craving." Elder Ballard then explains HOW to pray:
1. Thank Him
2. Express sincere faith in Him
3. Ask Him for the strength to overcome
4. Set aside all pride
5. Turn your life and your heart to Him
6. Ask to be filled with the power of Christ's pure love
"You may do this many times, but I testify to you that your body, mind and spirit can be transformed, cleansed, and made whole, and you will be freed." (Italics added)
He didn't just say, "you might be freed." He said "you WILL be freed."
Today was a good day. We had Maho's siblings and their families over for dinner. I made dessert, and somehow they all brought dessert! We had SO MUCH dessert! Moon Pie, german chocolate cake, chocolate chip cookies, and ice cream! But guess what? I didn't have a single taste! I didn't even feel real tempted! It was amazing.
This morning I prayed just exactly how Elder Ballard said we should. Perhaps He is changing me already. I'm sure I will have to pray like that many more times. But He WILL transform my body, mind and spirit! What a relief that will be.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
"Lord, save me"
That's one of my very favorite scriptures. Today I'm really leaning on it, because yesterday I took a humbling tumble.
Just when you think you've got everything under control, just when you're feeling so strong, just when you know you'll never go back to stupid old habits, because why would you?.....
You do. Stupid. That was me yesterday. Yes, I took a pretty severe tumble. What happened? All I wanted was SUGAR. I wanted chocolatey, chewy, ooey-gooey, yummy.... It was all I could think about. I was trying to resist.
I even took Tessy to McDonald's for lunch, ordered myself a grilled chicken salad and water. I didn't even put the dressing on because I read "corn syrup" in the list of ingredients (I went and asked for salsa instead. Guess what? Even their salsa has corn syrup! Why McDonald's??? I really hate that!).
My weakness took over when I asked Tessy if she'd like to go to Walmart and get a treat. All I could think about was their bakery goodies. So off we went. I bought a box of chocolate doughnuts, a piece of chocolate cake, and a package of pumpkin chocolate chunk cookies. I also bought a sack of Roma tomatoes. I had to laugh when we got up to pay and Tessy, in her LOUD voice said, "Wow! We didn't get much healthy stuff!!" The skinny lady in front of me turned and looked as she finished paying and picked up her sack of fruits and veggies. I was embarrassed. But still wanted my fix.
Well, the rest of the day is history. I won't subject you to all the morbid details. My point in sharing this is that we are human. Just because we think we've got something all figured out doesn't mean we won't slip and fall ever again.
It's a good thing that the Savior doesn't have a time limit on His return policy. We can return again and again, over and over, repent and plead with him to exchange our hearts for a new one, a more humble one, a more trusting and diligent one, and stronger one, a more disciplined one, and a changed one. That is what He does for us. His love and grace do not expire. There's no "3rd strike and you're out." Satan would have us believe that if we mess up too many times, we don't deserve Christ's love, His understanding or His forgiveness. That's one of his lies.
"And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.
But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was aafraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me.
And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little afaith, wherefore didst thou bdoubt?" Matthew 14:29-31
Peter was an apostle. He must have been a very faithful, strong capable person. But even he forgot to call upon the Lord in a moment of weakness (lack of faith). However, as soon as he did, Jesus immediately stretched forth his hand and saved Peter from succumbing entirely.
My prayer is that I can have fewer "What the heck..." moments, and a few more "Lord, save me" moments. I believe that He will save us from our weaknesses if we humble ourselves and trust Him to do so.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Sweet Seduction/ Sugar Addiction Video
http://www.viddler.com/
Sunday, February 20, 2011
We Need God's Love to Be Happy
And to Overcome Addiction
We all seek happiness everyday. We are supposed to be happy. Heavenly Father has said, “…men are that they might have joy.” (2 Nephi 2:25) Why is it, then, that so many of us are unhappy, dissatisfied, empty? Could it be that we are seeking happiness in the wrong places? Or that we have forgotten what real joy is?
A dear friend once shared with me her experience wherein the Lord taught her how she needed to fill her emptiness. She and her husband had always had a strong, healthy relationship. But she had been feeling empty inside, and thought she needed more of his attention and affection. He usually came home from work for lunch. So this particular day, in an attempt to fill her void with his love and adoration, she made his favorite lunch. She carefully set an elegant table for two, and eagerly primped and groomed to look her best before he arrived home.
He was very pleased by the delicious meal, the beautifully set table, and a beautiful wife with whom to eat his lunch. They enjoyed their lunch together. Then he thanked her for the lovely meal, gave her a kiss, and headed back to work.
She was severely disappointed. She still felt empty. Why hadn’t he made her happy? Why hadn’t she received the love that she was so desperately seeking? Her initial thought was to fill the void with temporary happiness—chocolate!
Instead she knelt in prayer. She told her Heavenly Father how disappointed she was that her husband was not giving her the love that she so desperately hungered for. She asked Heavenly Father what more she could do. Then the warmth of the Spirit overcame her as these words filled her mind and heart, “It is my love you need. Let me fill you with my love.”
She realized that it was not her husband’s responsibility to fill the void she had inside. Rather it was her responsibility to turn to her Heavenly Father for the love that He is both willing and eager to give, if we would but receive.
What are we seeking to fill the void? Quick, easy happiness? Television? Food? Work? Or any number of addictions? Are those things filling us with joy? Where is true joy and happiness to be found?
In Lehi’s vision he “beheld a tree, whose fruit was desirable to make one happy.”(1 Nephi 8:10)
“And as I partook of the fruit thereof it filled my soul with exceedingly great joy; wherefore, I began to be desirous that my family should partake of it also; for I knew that it was desirable above all other fruit.” (1 Nephi 8:12)
What does the fruit in Lehi’s dream represent? The Love of God. Therefore the Love of God is desirable to make one happy. The Love of God filled Lehi’s soul with exceedingly great joy, and he knew that the Love of God was desirable above all other fruit.
This has become a very favorite scipture:
Draw bnear unto me and I will draw near unto you; cseek me diligently and ye shall dfind me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. (Doctrine and Covenants 88:63)
By drawing near unto God, we feel His love, and no longer have a need to fill a void, because we are filled with His love. It takes daily effort, but the time investment is far outweighed by the blessings received.
And behold, and lo, I am bwith the faithful always. Even so. Amen. (Doctrine and Covenants 62:9)
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Over the hump
Today for breakfast Maho made the yummiest omelet I have ever eaten in my life! It was packed with veggies and had a little chopped lunch meat, topped with avocado. YUM!
This evening I cut up a plateful of fresh veggies: radishes, jicama, bell pepper, carrots, cauliflower, and mushrooms, and ate them with homemade hummus. Ooooh, so yummy.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Supermom Superfood Granola
Supermom Superfood Granola
Mix together:
6 cups rolled oats (old fashioned style)
1 cup walnuts, chopped
1 cup almonds, chopped
1 cup buckwheat
1 cup flaxseeds
1 cup quinoa (optional)
1/2 cup chia seeds (optional)
1 1/2 cups shredded unsweetened coconut
Mix together:
1 3/4 cup honey
3/4 cup oil (I use canola or olive, but nut oils would be really yummy)
1 1/2 t sea salt
1 1/2 t cinnamon
1 T vanilla extract
Combine the 2 mixtures. Spread some on a cookie sheet and bake at 350 for about 15 minutes, stirring once. I like to cover my counter top with paper bags that I've cut apart so they lay flat. When the granola is done, I dump it out on the paper bag-lined counter top to cool, and repeat with the rest of the granola.
My favorite way to eat this is with some Greek yogurt sweetened with a packet of Stevia, a sprinkle of cinnamon, fresh or frozen blueberries, and granola on top. Heavenly.
Sweet Beet Salad Dressing
Sweet Beet Salad Dressing
4 small beets (golf ball size) or 1 really big beet
1/2 cup agave nectar
1/4 cup olive oil
2 T cider vinegar
3/4 t sea salt
Blend all in blender and enjoy! Today I at it over spring greens (from Costco--my fav), sliced mushrooms, green onion, sunflower seeds, and topped it all with some crab meat.
I think I might eat the exact same thing for dinner tonight!!
Day 2 Boundaries are Liberating
“When I was 15 years old, I often felt that there were too many rules and commandments. I wasn’t sure that a normal, fun-loving teenager could enjoy life with so many restrictions. Furthermore, the many hours spent working on my father’s ranch were seriously dipping into my time with my friends.
“This particular summer, one of my jobs was to ensure that the cows grazing on the mountain pasture did not break through the fence and get into the wheat field. A cow grazing on the growing wheat can bloat, causing suffocation and death. One cow in particular was always trying to stick her head through the fence. One morning, as I was riding my horse along the fence line checking on the cattle, I found that the cow had broken through the fence and gotten into the wheat field. To my dismay, I realized that she had been eating wheat for quite some time because she was already bloated and looked much like a balloon. I thought, ‘You stupid cow! That fence was there to protect you, yet you broke through it and you have eaten so much wheat that your life is in danger.’
“I raced back to the farmhouse to get my dad. However, when we returned, I found her lying dead on the ground. I was saddened by the loss of that cow. We had provided her with a beautiful mountain pasture to graze in and a fence to keep her away from the dangerous wheat, yet she foolishly broke through the fence and caused her own death.
“As I thought about the role of the fence, I realized that it was a protection, just as the commandments and my parents’ rules were a protection. The commandments and rules were for my own good. I realized that obedience to the commandments could save me from physical and spiritual death. That enlightenment was a pivotal point in my life.”
Many times I have thought about giving up sugar, but felt like it was too restrictive. "I wasn’t sure that a normal, fun-loving [wife and mother of 5] could enjoy life with such a restriction." I loooooooove to eat sugary treats! It's fun to enjoy a treat together! But looking back through my journal the other day, I realized that sugar has done nothing to help me in my life. Conversely it has been a huge stumbling block for me. It's been the source of a lot of pain and regret.
Some may say, "Geeeez, it's not like you're doing drugs or drinking alcohol." But that's why sugar's been such a great tool for Satan to use on me. He knows he can't get me with drugs or alcohol. But it's very clear to me that if he can keep me living a mediocre life--feeling lousy, tired and grumpy a lot of the time--he will have succeeded; because I would be kept from doing God's work to the level that I need to be. Not only that, I would be "miserable like unto [Satan] himself." (2 Nephi 2:27)
"Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself." 2 Nephi 2:27
Addiction is captivity. Being trapped in a fat body is captivity. I choose liberty and life through Jesus Christ. He will help me. What a comfort that is.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Day 1
Yesterday I could have gassed Bin Laden right out of whatever cave he's hiding in. I was sooooo gassy from all the junk (sugar, mostly) I'd eaten the day before. Gassy McGasserson. None of that today. I'm sure my family and house guests are glad. :)
For dinner tonight I made two gorgeous loaves of french bread (to go with our vegetable soup), of which I did not partake. Yay me!
To clarify, I will eat fruit and natural sweeteners. Here is a list of natural sweeteners that I will eat:
raw honey
agave nectar
stevia
pure maple syrup
brown rice syrup
Evaporated Cane juice is still up in the air. Isn't that just sugar? Or brown sugar at best? Hmmm, I don't know. Better do some checking.
For lunch I ate our Sunday dinner leftovers of roasted vegetables. This is sooooooo yummy, that I'm gonna share the recipe:
Roasted Veggies
1 yam, peeled and chopped
1-2 zucchini, sliced 1/2" thick
1 red onion, cut into wedges
1 eggplant peeled and chopped
1-2 bell peppers, cut in chunks
2-4 red or yukon gold potatoes, cubed
Place veggies in 9x13" baking pan. Drizzle with mixture:
1/4 cup olive oil
3 cloves garlic, pressed or minced
2 T balsamic vinegar
Rosemary and thyme, fresh or dried
Salt and pepper to taste
Bake at 475 degrees for at least an hour. Stir occasionally. YUUUUUM!! The yams and eggplant are my favorite!
Beginning
I've also realized that I've been given this struggle so that I'd have a reason to turn to Him; to humble myself and learn to rely on Him.
I plan to write each day in hopes of helping myself stay on track, and at the same time sharing with others my journey, inspiration and insights, new-found information, recipes, etc. Perhaps we can help each other. There is strength in numbers. I'm banking on that.